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February 28 Our Great High PriestI was reading Hebrews this morning and came to a part that was previously highlighted.
As I read over this section I read it in a new light.
I love that about the Bible, you can read the same passage 20 times and God will show you 20 different things about it.
Hebrews 4:14-16 talks about our great high priest: Jesus
It says…
As I was praying about this and reading it over again I started to feel this weight lifted from me.
This is why we should never stray from the word… it is the voice of God in this life of struggle.
I was thinking of my sin and selfishness lately.
I’ve been trying to do things my own way which is entirely impossible without completely screwing things up.
And then I was reminded that Jesus Himself was not exempt from temptation.
It says in verse 15 that
Praise God for that!
Jesus doesn’t say suck it up... He says, “I know what you are going through… let me help you.”
I thought about this and how powerful it is.
This is how we help each other here in the world.
God can use our struggles to minister to others.
Think of the formerly abused helping the abused or the recovering alcoholic helping someone overcome an addiction to alcohol.
Jesus, in the same way, tells us that whatever we are tempted with, He has already been there… but overcame it without sin.
and He wants to help us through it.
Because of this, we are able to, “approach the throne of grace with confidence.”
We don’t have to be afraid to take out sin and rebellion to God.
We are invited to, “receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
I was thinking that it’s not the temptation that is the problem…
it will always be there because Satan loves to thrown salt in our wounds.
The real problem is our faith and reliance on Christ.
I tend to forget that we are given power over temptation through Jesus.
[Philippians 4:13]
[1 Corinthians 10:13]
We are given the power but we play with temptation like it is small and harmless.
We toy with it when what we are actually toying with is our destruction and shame.
The longer we play with temptation the more quickly we dive into sin.
But it’s not over. Jesus conquered sin for us.
We just need to do our part in killing it as it surfaces in our lives, so we can go to the throne…
to the cross that labels us free…
and seek the help that Christ so willingly offers us.
I need to continue to jump into the word and not just read it
but study it and listen to what God is telling me through it.
so much is learned and so much of our relationship with Christ is restored in reading God's word.
For me... I just need to stop wasting my time and do it. February 25 grace?grace is so hard for me to understand
maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my background.... maybe it's my sinfulness
The dictionary tells us that grace is a few things
-a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment (are you kidding me?!?!!)
-favor or good will (not quite there yet)
-favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity (temporary? isn't that the opposite of grace?)
The bible describes grace a lot
God has described grace to me this way
-by taking my unworthiness and replacing it with forgiveness and an unexplainable love.
It's my invitation to run freely into the arms of my creator.
Imagine loving someone who killed your child
That is what we have done
we sentenced Jesus to death because otherwise we could not be in God's presence as filthy as we are
He is so perfect that He cannot be around sin that is not paid for
but He died willingly, suffered an excruciating death so that I will never know Hell
grace
Christ takes my selfishness and makes me blameless
grace
Christ takes my disobedience and invites me to His throne
grace
Christ made a way that I don't have to pay for my evil thoughts and desires
grace
I don't understand it
but I can feel it
grace is forgiveness, freedom, love and a prize I don't deserve
nothing I have ever done or will ever do deserves this
but that is grace
it's free, it's flowing, it's eternal
It's God
and it's mine
It's ours Eburru - incredible (5 part)Wednesday was our day of rest
some of the team stayed back at camp while a bunch of us went on an expedition
to explore some craters and steam vents and mountain tops
This is where you really see the beauty of the land of Eburru
though we see so much beauty just be opening our eyes,
to go off the beaten trail and see what only tribes and wild life see...
it's stunning
we visited a crater first, with hot steam vents coming from the ground
we walked to the bottom and over to the other side inside this volcano
and saw a couple of monkey that resembled skunks, surprisingly
after the crater we went to this hill that looks down on the camp
there is a satellite on top and a road to walk up
at the top is a view I could never compare with anything I've seen before
as we sat down to rest we looked down over part of the great rift valley
from there you could see lake naivasha (home of hippos) and mt. longonot (which I climbed last year)
there is a continuous horizone of mountains and valleys and fields
wish shadows from quick moving clouds
and smoke rising from hard working farmers.
the land reminds me of what God had in mind when he created the earth
complete beauty
we left Eburru at 2pm taking the 45 minute drive down the mountain and a few more hours back to Kibera
Eburru is a favourite place among teammembers now
we hope to return there in the spring
if not... we know God is there
watching over His people Eburru - shovel, pour, mix (4 part)Tuesday....
a very long day
it started out with the murder of our friend Frederick...
I inched around the kitchen hut trying to psych myself up, thinking....
I may never see this again so maybe I'll watch how they do it this once
well, they grabbed his legs and I was done
I took off pretty quick and pretty much didn't see anything cause Frederick was cute and I don't like blood.
but it was over very quickly and he didn't even make any noise
while the men prepared him for cooking the team prepared for construction
our first building experience sinse arriving here las september
Manual labour is great
it feels good, you get sun and fresh air and fellowship
you get to laugh as your teammates do things wrong... it's great
actually, I tried to wheel around a wheel barrel of cement -
in one word I was pathetic
it's HEAVY!
we helped the workers mix their cement and fill in the foundation
which took a few hours and was great to get to know the workers and just hang out with the team
after building we had lunch
and Frederick was delicious!!!
we then waited for some ladies to arrive at the camp
and Anna J. taught a bible lesson to the ladies of Eburru
she did a fantastic job, with the complications of translation and occasional feeling of being ignored,
the ladies were really receptive and asked her to go on when she was finished.
instead we each gave a short testimony and spent the rest of the time just talking to the ladies.
it was then when we got word that we were to do an open air in less than an hour.
we had prepared for this before leaving Kibera but we were told that we were not going to have time to do one.
well... that wasn't true so we dragged our tired bodies to the matatu once again
and headed off down the road to begin our service.
we prayed along the way for stregth and joyfulness in ministry
because it's difficult to minister to people when you are tired and cranky
we arrived to find maybe 75 adults and children in the area and got their attention with a few songs from Pastor Steve
with renewed attitudes we began with a drime called thief
I then explanied the drime with the help of Steve's translation
and Alysha followed me with a short testimony
Brian was the teacher that day and spoke a short message to the crowd
the people kept their distance but listened intently
and when Brian was finished Pastor Steve finished the service with prayer calling everyone to come close
we then packed up the sound equipment and generator and headed back for dinner
again... Frederick was delicious! February 23 Eburru - burn baby burn (3 part)Monday was a great day, maybe even my favourite.
My sunburn was nearly gone by morning and I was ready to get going.
Our first mission was door to door which didn’t really make sense at first because…
Well, we couldn’t really see many houses.
We loaded up the maize and beans to be distributed and hopped in the matatu around 9am
We drove down to the valley and stopped along this one road and all of a sudden people just appeared.
Pastor Steve and Mary helped some locals get a bag of maize and then we headed out again further down the road.
Another stop, another bag of maize,
I was wondering when we were going to be doing anything and just then we were told to walk over to this one house.
It was the house of one of the church members.
The wife went to church but the husband didn’t
and they asked Tyler to talk a bit and read some scripture.
As he talked Steve translated and after we had stayed around for a bit, we gave them their beans and headed down the road once again.
After another maize stop we were broken up into 4 teams and headed out on foot.
Our team stopped at 3 different houses, each taking about 15 minutes to walk to, and met with some of the locals. The first lady was working away in her garden and so we helped her pick beans while she asked us questions and talked to our translator Gabriel.
The second house was home to a woman, her husband and their 7 kids.
Only her and two of the children were home and as the kids stopped crying from fright of the white people, she told us some things we could pray for and so we spent a few minutes in prayer for her family and headed off again.
The third house was of a woman who’s child was sick so we prayed with her until we heard our ride pull up and beep.
All of the houses we visited were of people who were Christians and went to church
And though I wondered why we were there at first, I ended up being very encouraged by their faith and perseverance in such a difficult place to live.
We headed home for lunch and then at 3 we headed out to a local school to teach.
We sang some songs with the children and then did the Alleluia drime again.
Anna S. and I had the grade 8 class and I taught on fear.
I had them write down 10 things they are afraid of and we went through the bible to see what to do with fear when it comes round.
Anna helped me a lot and when I was done teaching we burned their fears there on the dirt floor of the classroom.
I had a lot of fun teaching them, they were very receptive and paid close attention.
We went home after playing with the kids and an interesting thing happened that evening.
Dinner came riding in on a bicycle… Eburru - New Church (2 part)Sunday, we woke up bright and early for a busy day.
We found out the night before that we were to do an extra service in the morning.
We needed to leave for the first church service at 8:30 so we had breakfast and quiet time before that.
We piled in the matatu and drove down the bumpy trail to our first service.
This was the English service where the church was the first time we came to Eburru.
The church tent used to overlook this valley in a school yard not far from camp
and we waited outside while chairs were set up in one of the classrooms
for us to begin our service.
We started out with a few songs and then we did the Alleluia drime
which turned out to be the drime of the week… I think we preformed it 4 times.
After that, Brandon explained the drime and then Tyler delivered a message of purpose in life and walking with the Lord.
We concluded with prayer and talked to some young people briefly
before getting back in the matatu and heading out to our next service.
The new church location was closer to more homes and it was great to see
how much the church had grown.
It was also awesome to see some familiar faces
and we were welcomed with great enthusiasm.
We did the same service again and after the drime I sat out on the grass
for my first nice sunburn of the year.
With no shade in sight and no seats left in the tent I couldn’t escape it
so I just draped my sweater over my head and prayed that it would not be too painful.
When Tyler was done speaking, an older lady accepted Christ into her life
and rejoicing broke out in the church, but not as much as Heaven that morning.
After that service we had youth service.
Another drime and then Anna S. talked about the cross,
it’s significance, what it meant 2000 years ago and what it means to us today.
We headed back to camp around 3pm and it was pb&j for lunch… yum.
We hung out and relaxed before dinner and after dinner
we dragged a mattress out back behind the huts and watched the stars for a few hours. Eburru - hello again (1 part)We departed for Eburru Saturday morning
for our second ministry trip to this gorgeous area overlooking the great rift valley.
Our two matatus, now in “working” order,
got us there without having to pull over once… praise God.
We made two short pit stops on the almost four hour trip
and then headed up the rocky mountainside.
We arrived at the camp (same one as I had described in my previous updates) in Eburru.
We climbed out of the vans and once again took in the view
of the crater laden volcano country that sits 9200 feet above sea level.
With the sun blazing hot it’s hard to convince yourself that it is actually cold up there…
but it is. Being that high in altitude, the air is chilly.
I didn’t have a thermometer but I would guess that
the nights get to be around 5 to 10 degrees Celsius.
During the day though, it’s way too easy for a pale girl like me to get burnt…
and quickly.
We were greeted by Pastor Steve and his wife Mary who always so graciously put up with us and take care of the team while we are there.
Not to mention arrange all our ministry visits and programs.
Two Canadians were also staying at the camp…
Dean and Jocelyn, from Kingston Ontario,
will be staying in their little hut until the end of May.
It was definitely a welcome change to have someone from back home around.
The girls unpacked into the nearly finished concrete huts while the boys sat down with the men of Eburru for a bible study.
After dinner and dishes everyone went to bed and as tired as I was,
I laid awake until about 3:30am not really sure why,
but that was the start of a few days with a lack of sleep. frederick lyricsThis song was written about one of our dinner meals while in Eburru...
Frederick by Brandon Brown
In just one day who knew my life would change?
As daylight fades I brush my bangs away
I see something, my insides tickle
It looks like a sheep tied to a bicycle
What a handsome beast oh our eyes meet
Was this the love of my life I was about to meet?
I think it is
Me and Frederick will be together for life
One man, one sheep
It was love at first sight
I petted him, he tried to bite
I shyly giggled and said goodnight
That morning I woke with love in my heart
Only I see my love being cut apart
Fell to my knees and shake
Is that blood pouring from his neck?
I think it is
Me and Frederick will be together one day
One man, one sheep
For eternity
As I stand over him
Our love grows dim
He looks delicious and smelly
He’s about to go from my heart to my belly
Oh look at this
It is Frederick, cooked up all nice
One man, one sheep
It was love at first bite
Soon he will go from my body
All the way to the squatty potty
Frederick, you will be missed
Goodbye, goodbye February 16 up countrya ministry trip is almost underway
we leave for Eburru tomorrow morning
yes... the same place that has those huge enormous giant flying insects
i'm looking forward to it though
we have gotten a lot of planning done and I'm confident that we are prepared for this trip
I learned a new drime a few days ago and will be performing it at church
im a horrible actor but I'll give it my best
so we head out tomorrow
and head back wednesday evening
I'm sure ill have lots of stories for you when we return February 15 humansisn't it great that none of us are perfect?
it can make things very interesting at times...
this team I love has been having a rough few weeks
collectively!
we had an awesome team meeting on monday morning and talked about things for a few hours
struggles, frustrations, misunderstandings, pet-peeves
I love when things are finally brought out into the open
because that is the time when healing begins
communication is so huge
and so important
and when we fight it or run from it it just makes things messy
so this team is being stregthened once again by truth
and in unity through our purpose for being here...
which is Christ.
I ask you to pray though...
for this team as a whole
we live together in a culture that is not our own and are in part a family of strangers
which can be awesome at times and very difficult at others.
please pray for unity, patience, communication and a growing love for eachother...
for me, anna j, anna s, rachel, brian, brandon, melissa, tyler, elisabeth, kayla, scott and alysha
I'm still part of the best team ever
but we are all human. February 14 happy valentines daycause there's nothing more cheesy than a group of white people - all wearing red - in kenya
yep...
with the exception of scott and Anna S., everyone is wearing red and pink shirts today
the reason...
cause every kenyan we have talked to in the last week told us that on valentines day we are supposed to wear red
the scam... we have seen maybe 10 out of 80 people this morning actually doing that very thing
maybe this will change as the day progresses
as for this group of wazungu...
we look dumb but we make this dumb look good!
happy valentines day! February 10 Superbowl party!We can have fun here too you know…
One of our leaders came back with a DVD copy of the superbowl
and so, our most talented activities director, Melissa,
planned 'family fun night' as a superbowl party.
Of course there were 175 questions about what they do and don’t have in Canada…
“does the superbowl air in Canada?”
“no, Tyler… it’s too cold to have cable TV because the cables freeze… and if you can get the cable to work there’s the problem of the seals chewing on the wires… what is football anyways?”
that’s dripping in sarcasm of course, but they eventually stopped the Canadian jokes
and we sat down to watch the game.
Before the game started was the best thing ever though
Melissa (with some help) made tacos, veggies with dip and…. wait for it….
Chicken wings!!!!
Yeah, we had chicken wings!!
Most of you are probably like, “so what I had those last Tuesday at Casey’s.”
Well, chicken wings here are an amazing break from beef stew and ugali weekly
as much as I enjoy ugali
(the hope youth know what I’m talking about)
So we grabbed some food and sat down in front of our borrowed 3” television set with rabbit ears
and turned on the game.
My team sang the national anthem and cheered while I sat there
stubbornly waiting for someone to start up Oh Canada – which never happened
it was almost kickoff time and wouldn’t you know it….
The power went out!
We sat there in the dark citing T.I.A. (this is Africa)
and trying to eat our dinner in darkness
about 10 minutes later the power turned back on
and after a short yell of excitement we started the game back up.
It was probably one of my favourite ‘family fun nights’
cause it had the feeling of being at home
And, I was able to share it with people who understood what home feels like
even though I am from a different country than my team.
we are similar, despite most of my days consisting of answering questions like,
“are your power outlets the same in Canada?”
or, “in Canada, do you ever go swimming outside, or is it too cold?” February 07 StrongholdsI had mentioned that I had not been having a great week.
This is the outcome of not guarding my heart.
Strongholds are the cause of my struggles lately
feelings of inadequacy and beating myself up a lot.
They aren’t things I like to talk about but I know I’m not the only one, so be encouraged
They can be beaten…
Strongholds are personal things that Satan uses against you
John 10:10 says the thief comes to steal, kill and destroy
Since the beginning of time he has been doing just that
From deceiving eve in the garden of Eden to making us feel worthless and small today
Satan’s only joy is when God’s children deny their father
I read once that the devil’s greatest trick is to convince us that he doesn’t exist…
What better way to win a battle…?
He preys on fear and making people feel far from God
and he normally does this when he sees you getting closer to Him
Because nothing makes the enemy more angry than our relationship and reconciliation with Jesus
It’s when things aren’t right spiritually that you don’t really have to worry about being attacked
I’ve been in both places and I’ll take the attacks over distance from my creator
any day – as hard as they may be
I got on board with this mission knowing that things would not always be easy
Far from it in fact… not a day goes by where I’m not broken, upset, angry, hopeless, frustrated, annoyed, confused or feeling out of my league.
The past few weeks have been a reminder to me of who I am and how imperfect I am
I’ve struggled with these strongholds before, fear of failure, fear of rejection…
I have dealt with them in the past as well but like I said if you don’t guard your heart…
You can set yourself up for one nasty fall
I spent nearly a week taking everything personally
Small comments that meant nothing would put me in a downward spiral toward a question of self worth and low self esteem
I would convince myself that I don’t belong here, that I’m not cut out for this and that my team is burdened by me.
My fear of being a nuisance caused me to isolate myself
and clashed with my fear of being alone in my struggle
I put off turning to the only one who can cure me of this ugly sickness
because the feelings of not being good enough are what Satan likes to push the most
If he can convince you that you aren’t good enough for God then he has done his job.
We can open the Bible and read the truth in Romans 8
that nothing can separate us from God’s love…
not even Satan’s harsh attempts
because the Devil himself is terrified of our God
It’s funny how we let him win so many battles though
Not funny haha but funny pathetic
We push ourselves away from the one who never pushes,
we turn our backs on the one who never turns away
and we convince ourselves that we aren’t loved by the one who never stops loving us.
The truth is… I’m NOT cut out for this and I AM out of my league
The difference is how you look at the problem… through your eyes or God’s
Only one of these has the solution
My eyes tell me I should quit…
throw in the towel and give up cause I’ll never make a difference here
God’s eyes tell me I am doing well…
Like a loving father teaching his frightened child to ride a bike… when you fall off he picks you up and gets your started again.
Eventually his guidance and encouragements give you confidence
and you learn how to ride this part of the journey
with your father following closely behind with hands stretched out
in case Satan comes by and tries to jam a stick in your spokes.
Or, maybe for you Satan is that kid on the side of the road laughing at you
as you uneasily peddle your wobbling bike down the sidewalk
If you see things through God’s eyes being out of your league isn’t so scary
He is the one who is doing the work… he just wants us to come work with him
Being a Christian is take your kid to work day…every day
He wants us to learn… to experience…
not only for our benefit but for the benefit of others around us
I’m not in Kenya because I’m qualified to be a missionary…
I’m in Kenya because God is working here and he wants me to see what he’s doing
and get my hands dirty helping Him work.
I said before that “not a day goes by where I’m not broken, upset, angry, hopeless, frustrated, annoyed, confused or feeling out of my league.”
This is because I’m using my eyes
But when I remember who I am in Christ, not a day goes by where I’m not forgiven, loved, overjoyed, encouraged, confident, treasured and unbelievably grateful.
It’s a choice to make… be a slave to fear or give it over to God
I try to remember that when you believe a lie from Satan it is an offence to God.
It’s a slap in the face to the one who loves us as we are
God wants us to be happy and He wants us to be with Him
And He will gladly take these struggles if we would just let Him
We are given the strength to be victorious
With Christ standing in the gap
Read Romans 8:28-39
We are more than conquerors February 04 I'm still hereI've not been updating as often and I apologize for that
There are a few reasons.. none of which are very good excuses but they are excuses none-the-less
excuse #1
I had a rough week last week
I think the stress caught up with me and I was being really hard on myself
I don't like to write when I'm upset or angry...
It makes everything seem very negative and that is far from the case
cause the Lord never has a bad day... though I have many
excuse #2
I've been really busy with these new ministries that keep popping up
I am becoming increasingly involved at the church on weekends (what's a weekend?)
and by the time Thursday comes (our day off) the only think that sounds fun is a 6 hour nap
We have all been exhausted lately
now... I'm not sure if this is due to how much we are out working
or if we all have amoebas and bronchitis
cause it has been circulating
excuse #3
(this one is probably my best one)
the Internet here is rubbish!!
seriously... I think we have been able to connect well once in the past 2 weeks
without interruptions or power failures
not to mention the connections crawl most days
regardless of my reasons for not writing lately
it will stop
I'm going to make time to keep you all informed
not cause you want to be
and not cause I want you to read
but because God has given me jobs to do
and to keep His amazing works to myself would be a waste |
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