some people have been asking some questions so I thought I would answer them collectively

 

#1 - Has your hearing cleared up?

 

-No, unfortunately not, at least not fully

i can hear out of my left ear fully but I still only have about 10% hearing in my right ear

which makes sleeping in really easy cause i can't hear my alarm

or brian standing at my door calling my name.

 

#2 - Do you get to spend much time with Kevin?

 

-Yes I do which is awesome. my teammates and I get to visit the AIM house every week

and more often if we go during free time

the girls went to paint the orphan girls nails two days ago

and the boys ended up painting their own as well

hilarious!

they are all currently walking around all shiny toed

#3 - Do you still like it there?

 

-absolutely! totally love it... even the bucket baths

cause you wouldnt beleive how good it feels to get clean after walking these streets

 

#4 - Are you going home for Christmas?

 

-doubtful...

 

 

we had a monkey on our house yesterday

it was actually quite big

he ran across our roof and into a tree

then a few hours later across the yard and into the boys' house tree

and then kayla one of our leaders thought it would be a good idea to throw rocks at it

never look a monkey in the eyes!

 

hmmm what else... things are great... been working on a video project

more on that as I start to shape it

LOVE it though... capturing kibera through a lense... so much fun

but scary when passersby know you have a camera and look like they are going to jump you

thank goodness for my body guards :)

 

anyways... thank you again to all those who have been emailing and posting here

i miss you all

hope everyone is well!

I thought about screaming that as I hurried through the crowd but they probably would have just laughed at me.

 

 

Hatari means danger and I never thought a feeling of fear would develop in a setting of 200 or so children

And I mean children… they were nearly all below the age of 12

 

On Tuesday (or was it Wednesday) of this week was the celebration of the end of Ramadan, a Muslim holiday

And someone must have thought it was a good idea to sell fireworks to kids….

 

A few of us were walking to the AIM house to play football with the orphans and there was a mob of kids on karanja road.

 

There was no way to get around them so we had to walk right through and I have to admit I was on the verge of being terrified.

A bunch of kids had bottle rockets and cherry bombs and they were setting them off everywhere.

 

We walked by one group huddled around a boy lighting up some fireworks

and they were chanting, “ROCKET ROCKET ROCKET” as it shot off down the street

into a group of about 50 kids.

Everyone was screaming and yelling and having a great time blowing things up...

including the wazungu (white people)

 

one of my teammates Anna showed us the mark on her shirt…

she was shot with a rocket in the chest and when she jumped the kids laughed hysterically at her.

She was ok. She said it felt like a cigarette burn

but it’s amazing to me that there aren’t a bunch of little Cyclops walking around Kibera!

 

I guess this is what happens when so many children lack parents… or even responsible ones.

It reminded me a little of Lord of the Flies.

almost half a million orphans with no one to tell them no.

I was punched in the face twice that day by a child.

They just don’t seem to know right from wrong cause no one has taught them.

 

Orphaned children are a huge problem, not just in Kenya…

and the worst part… it’s not by any fault of their own.

 

How do we help this problem when there are so many?

One at a time I suppose…

so some of you might be wondering...

what is living in Kibera really like?

 

well... let me tell you

 

I get up at around 7:30 which is when breakfast is served

we have breakfast teams that make breakfast on certain days

 

after breakfast the team that made it does dishes

speaking of dishes *sick*

 

I've included some photos of our dish cycle below...

for your viewing pleasure....

it's not my favourite chore.

 

then we have various scheduled things depending on the day

then lunch at 12:30 is fend for yourself

another dish team steps up and the cycle continues

 

various ministries in the afternoon, again... depending on day

sometimes we take the AIM matatu to the farther locations

(photo below)

 

dinner is at 6:30

our amazing helper michelle cooks dinner for us 5 days a week

she is the coolest kenyan and after our rat problem joked about putting rats in our samosas

was she joking?!?!

i told her if I find little legs in my food she is fired!

 

speaking of rats... she says she has killed about 40 in our pipes

I seriouslly hope that's an exaggeration

I asked what happens to them when they die in the pipes? how do they get out?

michelle says they dont... they just rot in there

nice......!

so that was probably why the kitchen smelled like death last week

 

she said they usually go to the oven to die which would also explain why the smell was strongest near the oven

so what do we do then?

turn the oven on of course!

mmmm something smells good! what's cooking?

you don't want to know!

 

michelle rocks... her sense of humour is hilarious

we do indeed have mouse problems though

however... I would take mice over roaches any day

problem is.... we have both!

 

there are photos of the kitchen below

as long as the food still tastes great and doesnt kill me... im good

 

ok so after dinner... you guessed it... dish teams

then various things depending on the day

sometimes if we have a free night we will take showers

now... keep in mind that the word shower is used loosely

 

there's a photo below so I'll walk you through it

the black buckets are filled by the tap in the wall...

when the water works...

which is rarely. so when there's water running it is constantly filling up black buckets

the black buckets are freezing so i boil some water on our propane stove

and mix it with the cold water in the orange bucket

then i use the cup to pour water on me and use soap and water

and voila! clean

 

where does the water go after I've thrown it all over?

on the floor of course... the nice dirty jagged concrete floor (sandals are a must!)

and there is a small hole in the corner that lets the water run outside

it smells great in the shower room!

 

make sense?

 

then there's laundry which is washed by hand by ladies we have hired to do so...

which comes back stretched and bleach spotted

but incredibly clean!

almost cleaner than new and trust me...

before they were washed... they were dirty!

 

and then there's our water... we dont drink tap water cause it's pretty much poison

we don't even boil it

we buy bottled water so that's pretty cool

and there's a picture of that too cause we drink a LOT of water

 

now... as gross as I just made everything sound.... it's really not that bad

in fact I rather enjoy living like this

it's humourous

and if you can't laugh at 9 months of bucket baths and moues infestation what are you gonna do?

cry?

no way.... Kenya is amazing and I love it here

so if living here comes with these kinds of comforts... I'll take em

 

plus.. if i could only show you the comforts that the Kibera residents have...

we are very well off in our humble abode!

 

 

When babies from new life don’t get adopted by three years of age there is hope for them.

I found out this week that the orphanage doesn’t just stop with new life

but continues on with the ark.

 

There are about 10 children at the ark, aged 3-11.

The home will allow them to live there until they are 18.

They live there because they have no where else to go

they have no where else to go because their families abandoned them

even worse… they are all HIV positive and 3 of them have disabilities including blindness and deafness.

Their chances of being adopted are slim because of age (everyone wants to adopt a baby)

but also because of their health.

 

You wouldn’t know they are sick.

They run about and play like any other kid on a sugar high.

They love their house mother and their home is beautiful.

Honestly… they are in a NICE place… much nicer than our place here on Karanja road

(although I am SO thankful for this place!!)

So that gives me peace… they are very taken care of.

 

In fact I’ve come to learn that Lance, the boy I talked about last week…

is not the only handicapped child in the new life home…

and if he is not adopted he will be in good hands at the ark.

 

This does not mean that being an orphan is alright because they are in great care.

Their physical needs are met... but their emotional needs are not.

 

When we walked into the house where they live they kind of ignored us at first.

I can understand why they would guard their little hearts…

they have been through more rejection in their short years than I could know.

I didn’t want to go at first because there was a possibility

that we would not be allowed to return.

I’m sure these kids feel like dogs on display at a pet store. You can see it.

People walking in an out…

Even dogs give up hope when they are passed by so many times…

imagine what a child would start to think.

 

It makes sense that they restrict outside visitors.

People that come in play with the children for an hour or so

and then walk out of their lives forever.

I didn’t want to do that to these kids we made it so that we don’t have to.

We talked to the house mother who is an amazing woman and she couldn’t have been happier that we wanted to come back. She would have had us stay all day if we could.

And so I told the children I would see them again…

and I will… at least every other week for a few hours…

 

I’ll introduce you to the kids when I get to know them better…

For now I can tell you just by spending an hour with them that:

 

Maggie thinks she runs the place…

she is the house gossip and knows pretty much everything that goes on.

 

Baraka (meaning blessing in Swahili) just wants to be loved

and will hold onto hope with all his might.

 

Clive, the eldest, seems to have given up hope of being adopted

but takes great responsibility caring for his younger “siblings”.

And they all look up to him.

 

Nigel is hilarious and does his own thing

including jumping in puddles after repeatedly being told not to…

typical trouble maker.

And like most trouble makers he gets away with a lot of it because he is a charmer.

 

That’s just a few of them… more to come.

I realize now that I really don’t know what love is all about.

 

I was feeding an orphan today. He was somewhere between 6 months and 1 year old.

I don’t remember his name but as I was feeding him I heard another baby crying.

There were at least 15 parentless babies in the room… all clawing for attention.

You can see the life in their eyes, they know they are loved in this place.

They are so trusting and affectionate but as I looked for the child who was obviously uncomfortable my eyes rested on a black sheep.

 

I don’t use the term black sheep to be an insult

this baby was just different from the other orphans.

He was strapped in a chair and seemed much weaker than the dozen or so other characters running in circles and chewing on anything that they could get their gummy mouths on.

 

I tried rattling a toy in front of him… he didn’t stop crying.

I tried a different toy… nothing.

I put a ball in his hand… nothing.

Finally I rubbed his head thinking he just needs some personal attention and he stopped crying for a bit.

I alternated between feeding one baby his fruit mash and rubbing the crying baby’s head.

I finally finished feeding the one and took him to get cleaned up.

When I came back the other baby was still crying.

I didn’t know what was wrong so I picked him up.

 

As I started to lift him up his head flopped like an infant and I realized, this child isn’t just weaker than the others, there’s something wrong with him.

I sat with him on the couch and learned that his name is Lance.

One thing that struck me about Lance is that he looked so familiar.

As I stared down into his eyes I realized that he did not stare back at me.

Not only that, his posture and his actions and his smile when I tickled him struck as if I’ve met him before.

 

I have met Lance before…

in my brother Jacob.

 

Lance is blind and he can’t walk or talk

or do anything that the other babies his age were doing.

Jacob is 17 and in the same state he was in when he was 6 months old only much bigger.

I held Lance and looked at him knowing that His parents abandoned him because he is different.

 

Tonight we spent some time worshiping and God spoke to me with words that hit me like a ton of bricks. He always speaks in undeniable truth straight to the heart.

 

I’ve always justified not going to see Jacob with… “It’s too difficult to see him like that” or “He won’t even notice if I’m not there.” Yet I stayed close to Lance all morning because I just wanted him to know that he wasn’t forgotten.

 

How can I show love to one child

when I haven’t shown that love to my own brother?

 

I can’t deny that Jacob knows who we are.

Even though unable to talk, his joy shines through his face

when my Mum announces that we have arrived to see him.

 

Even if he did not know me –

how can I turn my back on any child and claim to be a follower of Christ?

 

Would Jesus turn his back on Lance or Jacob

because they can’t see or speak or show love in return?

Does he love any of us less than the other

regardless of what we have done or where we are in life?

Absolutely not!

 

John 3:16… one of the most well known verses in the Bible says

“For God so loved the world…”

It doesn’t say for God so loved some people from this country and this place.

He loves everyone equally and so He sent someone to pay our way into a relationship with Him.

 

Why would God want a relationship with us?

Because we are His… for no other reason than He loves us.

 

This is the love that is difficult for a screw-up like me to understand and accept.

But it’s an amazing thing to receive… and just as amazing to pass on.

 

Jesus loved me when I didn’t know Him.

He loved me when I didn’t know how to show love back.

If that were not true I would not be where I am now.

The message is so simple and one I thought I understood.

To pour out love that is conditional is a slap in the face to everything that God has purposed… everything He has planned… everything He is.

 

I searched the word love in the Bible and the word came up 311 times and I’m not even sure if that’s all of them…

But it’s the message of Christ, God’s letter to us.

It’s all there is… it’s the plot and the moral and the summary of His life and it should be the same for mine if I am to claim to follow Him.

 

I have to confess… I don’t know what real love is… unconditional love…

I don’t know if I will ever fully understand His infinite grace.

But God shows me a new chapter of it every day.

If it weren’t for His love I would be an orphan, strapped in a chair, forgotten and abandoned by the world.

 

I think I know what one of my personal ministries is here now.

I need more time to pray about it but I don’t believe that my meeting Lance is a coincidence.

 

Mum, tell Jacob I’m sorry for being a bad sister… and please tell him I love him.

Have you ever been woken up in the middle of the night

by a man standing outside your window

talking rather loudly in a language you don’t understand?

 

I have!

 

I almost smacked my head on the underside of the bunk the first night I heard him.

It startled me to jumping halfway out of bed.

But then I found out what was going on…

 

Our night guard Moses is an amazing man.

He is a Kenyan and works for a security company that AIM has hired

to be at our gate 24/7.

Moses’ shift is from 6pm to 6am…

how he doesn’t go crazy being awake and alone all night is beyond me.

It always makes me smile to see him put on his wool hat, winter coat, thick pants, boots and mittens when the night air gets to a low of 74 degrees. (about 20 Celsius)

 

He sets up a table outside and reads for hours…

sometimes the newspaper, sometimes the Bible and sometimes other books we lend him.

 

But the thing that I love most about Moses

is the thing that scared me the first night I heard it.

He prays for us.

 

If I go to bed late sometimes I can catch him…

He circles our house singing and praying over us

for our safety, health, ministries and anything else he thinks of.

Every single night.

 

So now when I hear a man walking by my window

talking in a language I don’t understand I feel very safe.

Thank God for Moses an amazing brother and friend.

You are going to think I’m making this up but I assure you… this is all true!

 

I wrote a week or so ago about spending 24 hours with a Kenyan family.

I talked a bit about Sky and his Sunday morning preparations.

 

Well, while I was learning some Swahili and how to make Ngali and Chapatis,

another team member was learning something very different from her Kenyan family.

 

My teammate Melissa found out where a lot of people in Kibera get their minerals from.

They eat rocks.

I’m not kidding… not just plain rocks but roasted rocks!

Like cooking them makes a difference… [maybe it does]

 

I didn’t believe it at first but I walked by a stand yesterday and a lady was selling white roasted rocks.

 

Melissa sat with her family as they brought out the rocks.

I’m not sure what was going through her head

but you can probably imagine what you might think in this situation

having just been served a plate of things you can find out on your driveway.

They started to pick up the rocks and bite into them

like they were nothing more than a piece of hard candy

and told Melissa to have some cause they are good for minerals.

She said that her dentist would kill her and that she takes pills for iron.

They kind of laughed at her for not wanting to try it.

She gave in for politeness and bit a piece off and swallowed it.

 

Yeah… she swallowed a rock.

I don’t know what’s wrong with her either!

I was laughing cause all I could think of was how is she going to digest that?

 

But now you know… some Kenyans eat rocks for minerals…

Maybe that’s how they are strong enough to carry pails of water on their heads for miles.

As for me… I think I’ll pass on the minerals.

Tomorrow is the day

 

our first day with our new schedule

a taste at every day living for the FYM's in Kenya

 

we were assigned to our churches yesterday

mine is the blue house (Calvary) and I don't want to gloat but it is the best one!

just joking of course! all the churches rock

and they are truly doing God's work.

It will be exciting jumping into the ministries that they have formed and helping them start new ones.

I'm not sure what my internship at the blue house church will look like yet

but I know I will be busy!!!

 

They have a big youth group and one of the leaders Edward already asked me to join their youth choir

 

stop laughing!

 

I told him I will have to pray for God to give me a nice singing voice he says

nooooo He has given you one... You should use it to sing praises in front of the church

so I laughed at him

and he is still trying to convince me

 

other than that... I still have not figured out what my personal ministry will be

we are going to be spending saturdays and sundays at our internship (church)

and then mondays and wednesdays at our personal ministries

there are other days that will be dedicated to orphans and hanging out on Karanja road (our road)

 

and get this....

today

we

got

our

cell

phones

 

and keys

 

so at last ....we are free

That's all for now

I must go

 

Thank you all for your responces to my blog and my emails

I really do appreciate them!

What an awesome weekend!

 

We had a few off days winding down from our orientation in Kibera

so our leaders decided to take us all to a town called Kijabe

It's about an hour drive from Nairobi...in what direction I'm not sure but it's beaautiful

 

There is a mission there and an excellent hospital which not only did we get to visit

but I was able to become a patient and get my ears checked out.

If you did not know... the end (I hope) stages of my sickness have caused me to go partially deaf

I havent been able to hear properly for 12 days now and there were about 5 days where I could hear barely anything

it was really frustrating and discouraging when the rest of the team was doing ministry and I could'nt really do much because I couldnt hear what people were saying to me

but I learned a lot through this experience... I will share it with you later

 

one thing I'm thankful for is my team...

aside from their giggling at the deaf girl they have really helped me out in relaying messages and trying to translate english to english for me

but their laughter has brought a lighter side to being hard of hearing

 

the other thing I am thankful for is that I feel great

all the prayers have not gone un-heard... I think that there may have been purpose for a long sickness

and I am thankful for that.

 

lastly... my left ear is doing well... I can hear!

my right is still a bit plugged but it's getting better daily.

 

so the Kijabe hospital is really advanced

people from Sudan come to it because it offers such great service

they also have a children's hospital on site.

we had tours and hung out with some patients

 

other than that it was relax time for the kenyan team

we just....sat around

and it was fantastic

a well needed rest before we are hurled into full time ministry in Kibera.

 

it was a great time for the team to re-group as well and we had a LOT of fun

climbing trees... laughing... falling down stairs...

well one girl did...and we laughed at that too!

 

actually I fell down a hill with a roasted marshmellow and got it all over my skirt

and yes... we laughed at that too.

 

I will have some photos of Kijabe soon

so you will be able to see how beautiful it is.

I was told the other day that out of nearly 1,000,000 people there are about 450,000 orphans living in Kibera.

It is estimated that 40,000 of these orphans are living on the streets.

 

Last week we had the privilege of teaching 350 of these orphans.

We visited a school just for children who have lost or have been left by their parents.

When we walked in they were singing at the top or their lungs with smiles a mile wide.

They clapped and whistled and treated us like celebrities…

celebrities we are not, but here for them we are, and one smile makes coming all the way over here worth while.

 

Elisabeth and I taught 3^rd grade because regardless of where we go, the wazungu (white people)

are always asked to teach something. It keeps you on your toes having to be prepared to speak to hundreds.

It scares the crap out of some of my teammates but I can already see them warming up to it. J

 

Anyways… The third grade at the new adventures school is hilarious and full of little clowns.

You would never know they were orphans. Their English is coming along well but we needed Ann, their teacher, to translate for us anyways. So, Elisabeth and I shared the second greatest commandment in the Bible: love your neighbor as yourself.

We had them form pairs and they made friendship bracelets. They were to give the bracelet that they made to their partner.

We didn’t have much to offer other than our time and love but you could see that that was all they wanted anyways.

 

Speaking of orphans… AIM has a small orphanage with 13 kids that are sponsored.

Each of us have been assigned to one of them so that we can write to them weekly

and take part in a kind of big brother/big sister program. My kid’s is named Kevin.

He is 12 but he looks about 9. I don’t know much about him yet accept that he is obsessed with soccer.

He is a riot though and I’m looking very forward to spending a lot of time with him.

 

There are two photos below…

#1 – me at the new adventures school – the children are memorizing Mark 12:31

#2 – Kevin Mgodi – my little orphan friend

What’s a comfort zone?

Our leaders thought it would be an excellent idea to send us out individually to live with a Kenyan family for 24 hours.

These families live in Kibera, a slum that is sometimes difficult to walk through let alone live in.

Not that I would fully know.

24 hours is hardly enough time to take in the hardships and trials of daily life in the Kibera slums.

But, I feel like this experience has taught me more about Kibera than I ever would have learned from walking through it;

deeming this excellent idea exactly that… excellent.

 

The home I stayed at was home to Tabitha and her grandson Sky.

Tabitha has 4 children who are all grown and have moved out.

One of her sons lives a few doors down and one lives near the FYM house.

Her daughter is the mother of Sky and I did not get around to asking exactly why Sky did not live with one of his parents;

who are both living somewhere up country.

 

Sky is about 10 years old and in grade 4.

He was shy around me but not too shy to practically sit on my lap every chance he got.

This morning I watched as he prepared for church. First, he scrubbed his good shoes.

Then he took a bucket outside to bathe. After he was clean enough he came inside to get dressed.

His church clothes are kept in a special place and only used on Sundays.

He has a red collared shirt that is so big on him that his shoulder sticks out the neck hole.

This shirt also has 3 holes in the back but is the nicest one he owns.

He makes sure his shirt is tucked into his paint stained jeans and then slides his belt through the few remaining loops on his pants.

His belt went around his waist once and the end of it wrapped around to his back.

After he had tied his shoes and made sure his shirt was not wrinkled he grabbed a jar of Vaseline.

He took some Vaseline in his hands and wiped it all over his face and head and then his arms and legs.

I was told that some people do this to look healthier.

 

All of this for church. Sky takes such care of his few belongings and the way that he looks in God’s house that it shamed me.

It wasn’t that he was trying to look nice, and he really did.

It was that he was making such a big effort in respect for God. Sky knows Jesus.

We talked briefly about what Jesus means to him. His broken English was difficult to understand but his love was not.

Christ is someone who has gotten Sky through hard times, through family problems, through feeling alone and abandoned.

Jesus means so much to this little boy that he intentionally took 40 minutes to get ready for church.

 

When is the last time I spent 40 minutes getting ready to go to God’s house?

And the last time I did…was it for God?

I guess I learned a lot from this little boy who did not say much but as most people know…

It is not always words that speak loudly but actions.

Sky’s actions were a challenge to me, one I cannot ignore nor soon forget.